I'm alone for the first time in years and am scared.
The issue: Your spouse has died. You’ve lived together for years, and it seems that life without them will be unbearable. Besides missing your spouse’s companionship, you have questions about how you’re going to live your life. You have lots of people telling you what you should do and all of it seems overwhelming.
Your story: You’ve lived a long time with your spouse. Now they’re gone, and you haven’t done a lot of planning about what comes next. You have depended on your spouse to provide you money to live on as well as savings for your retirement.
Everything seems too big to handle. Just getting over not having your spouse as a partner anymore is something that’s been almost impossible to grasp.
You think you have to start making investment decisions. Some of those decisions are how will I find money to live, deciding whether to stay in your house or sell it and what will my life look now. You think you have to provide support for your children. After all, they just lost a parent.
You would like to have a process that focuses on you and your problems. You don’t really want to hear what you should do. You want to first understand what your options are and take your time making decisions. You feel that everyone is rushing you into making decisions that you’re not ready to make yet. There's just too much noise around you. You want the noise to quiet down for a while.
Challenges you might have...
- You feel that you're not ready to make any decisions.
- You don't know who you can trust. Most of your advisors had a relationship with your spouse and not you.
- You're not sure if you can continue to afford the lifestyle that you have.
- You have lots of investment accounts in different places. You're not sure what they are or whether they're right for you now.
- You might feel like people are telling you that you need to make decisions that you're just not ready to make.
- Consider calling a time out on all decisions that aren't absolutely necessary. We call this the decision free zone.
- You should understand that trust is earned and not given. Have a process for helping you learn how you you should trust others who want to provide you with advice.
- Doing a financial plan that shows various scenarios is a good start.
- Ask your investment advisor to "park" your money in a safe place. You'll make decisions later about what to do with it.
- You need to work with an advisor you trust in deciding what needs to be done. Find out what has to be done and deal only with those issue.